A Sophie Story

I have debated for the longest time whether to tell the story of Sophie's birth. I have been asked a million times about America's "no pain birth" ( I wouldn't know. After two days of labor Bailey was born via c-section. Failure to progress was the reason cited by doctors.) and whether I preferred the "Japanese way" or the "American way". My answers are usually straight and to the point, I don't want to offend anyone so I say something like, "All that matters is that the baby was healthy."

The pictures above we taken the day Sophie was born. I hesitated to post this picture, because quite frankly I look like death warmed over. I don't remember Bailey's birth being so hard on my body and soul as this one was. Maybe it had to do with the fact that Bailey was born with lots of people there to celebrate him and Sophie wasn't. Not because people weren't there, but because it seemed everyone was rushed, too busy, too stressed.

There was also Bailey to think about. I felt so sorry for him to have to be shuttled around, not really understanding where Mommy was and what was happening. Everytime someone brought him to the hospital to see me, my heart broke at the sight of his tired eyes and half smiles. I needed to be with my family not lying in some hospital bed. And the tears fell almost every night.......

Let me start at the beginning. After reviewing the facts, I decided to have a second c-section with Sophie because of the risks involved. Sophie's due date was February 14, but the doctors decided that it was okay to deliver her a little earlier. The c-section was scheduled for February 2. I was admitted to the hospital on January 31 so they could run some tests and get me ready for the c-section in general.

I was just anxious to see my little girl and happy to be able to sleep as much as possible before Sophie arrived. I passed those days reading books, watching TV, listening to the doctors talk about what would happen and generally in good humor.

The morning of the c-section Hubs and his mom came to the hospital. They stayed with me as I walked into the operating room and then I had to leave them and it felt so strange like I was saying good bye to friends at the airport, not going to have a baby. When Bailey was born, Hubs was there with me from start to finish. In Japan, that is not allowed. My heart broke a little upon hearing this.

They inserted the epidural and a spinal block. The spinal block would take effect sooner but would also wear off quicker.　　The epidural would take longer to work, but would be left in for pain relief up to three days after the c-section. The operating room filled with music and the c-section began.

I had been warned that the epidural might make me sick and sure enough I felt the room spin, my body begin to sweat and the retching started. I hadn't eaten anything since noon the previous day so it was all dry heaves. They injected me with some kind of medication and it subsided for a while and then came back. After two or three more doses of medicine I felt better, but now my tongue was sandpaper. (I hadn't been able to drink anything since six pm the previous day) The combination of being sick to my stomach, having a super dry mouth and that little paper curtain tickling my nose almost sent me over the edge. I kept telling the doctors and nurses I wanted to move, I needed to move.

After what seemed like an eternity, I got to see Sophie. The tears flowed freely and I remember my inly thought being that I wanted to touch her, hold her, but that would have to wait. I was sewn back up and everything was put back in the right place (I hope) amd was wheeled back to my room. They brought Sophie to see me later that afternoon and Hubs took pictures while I battled with dry mouth (no liquids until the following day, but a kind nurse who brought me ice to rub on my lips) and sweating that just would not stop.

With Bailey, he was born on Wednesday and I was discharged on Saturday. With Sophie, I was in the hospital for an entire week after she was born. I had a few visitors here and there, but most of the time it was just me struggling with breastfeeding and trying to be optimistic. I was worried about Bailey, I was worried about my husband who had pretty severe tonsilitis and I was worried about how I would handle it all once I got home and Hubs went back to working from nine am to ten or eleven at night. I felt bad enough emotionally, I was physically in pain and they wouldn't let me shower until the staples were removed. So, I guess I felt like I looked.

The doctor took pity on me and even though she was worried about my elevated white blood cell count, she let me leave a little earlier, one day in fact. We all struggled tose first few weeks to get used to this new little person as I am sure she struggled to get used to us. Now it seems like she has always been part of our lives.

So, if you really want to know if I prefered giving birth in Japan or the United States I can know truly say that it doesn't matter as long as everything works out alright. My heart is with my family and wherever my family is is home.