Worry For Nothing

So, I bit the bullet. I just did it. I took the bull by the horns. We went out for dinner tonight. Mom was there. Andy and Manda. Bailey and me and of course, Sophie making her first ever out in public without the help of a diaper debut. Oh the preparation, the thought, the foresight that went into it.

I rummaged around in Mom's closet until I found a purse big enough to hold a change of clothes, a plastic bag for dirty/wet clothes, a hand towel, flushable wipes and a pull up just in case. She needed absolutely nothing from that back save a bib for eating (a little off everyone's plate) and a flushable wipe for cleaning up afterwards. We were only out for about three and a half hours and Sophie liked the restaurant's bathroom so much that she asked to go. False alarm, though, turns out she only wanted to flush the toilet and play with the toilet paper dispenser.

Next step, night time training.

It's Potty Time

A week into potty training and Sophie seems to be getting the hang of it. There was only one accident today but she won't tell me when she has to use the potty, I just have to watch and guess. The next step is wearing big girl panties when we go out. That makes me more than a little nervous. Cleaning up a mess at home is relatively easy, in public, that is another problem entirely. I guess that it is back to the big, bulky diaper bag for a while with several changes of clothes. I had just been carrying a few diapers, a package of wipes and a bib in my purse. I really hope that I can get her pretty much potty trained before we head back to Japan in early June. Naps and night time still require a pull up and probably will for a while. Progress, one step at a time.

Current Events

We have had a fair amount of success with time outs to discipline Bailey. Now, every time that he is put into time out, he uses the bathroom in his pants. I think that he sees it as a get out of time out free card. Any suggestions on how to handle this would be greatly appreciated.

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On a happier note, we had a few visitors last week.

On Thursday, some friends from our old neighborhood stopped by. It was great to see them again, especially M-san who is expecting a baby boy (her second) any day now.

On Sunday, my former colleague and her family came for a visit. We enjoyed pizza and the kids played fairly well together. K-san we will have to do it again soon.

This Sunday we will go to a BBQ with some of Hub's friends from a job he had at a gas station when he was younger. There should be lots of kids and looks like the weather will cooperate, so I can't wait!!

I Wanna Be An Octopus When I Grow Up

There are certain times in your life when things just seem to click. Certain times when the light bulb comes on and you think to yourself this is what it is really about. Today was such a day.

Certain parts of potty training have pretty much been mastered. Other parts take a team to ensure success. The problem being that Bailey doesn't like to sit still unless he is asleep or eating. So, if a bathroom session involves more than a tinkle, he feels the urge to share the experience or he will quite simply get off the potty, put his underwear back on, do his business and then bring the dirty underwear to me. (Yes, I know this is an awful lot of detail, but I feel the need to share with you the madness that is potty training.)

As he sat there on the potty with Mommy reading a Thomas book; waiting, listening, hoping, Sophie let's us know it is time for milk. Just a few more minutes, I think, then he will be done and I can feed Sophie. But the minutes tick past and still nothing. Sophie's crying escalates. I get up to go check on her.

"Mommy, moooooooommmmmmyyyyyyyy," Bailey wails as I make milk. He is attempting a dismount. Oh dear god, please don't let him dismount. I snatch up Sophie and head for the bathroom. Just in time, one leg stretching, straining to touch the floor, but not quite. A little push from me and he is squarely back on the potty. Sitting on the floor with Sophie happily eating, trying to turn the pages of the Thomas book as Bailey takes care of business, I realize, this just might be my defining moment.

Multitasking. That is how you know you are truly a mother.

My Kettle's A-boiling!!!

Yesterday. Yes, that is where I will start. Yesterday. Seems as good a place as any.

Bailey was in a horrible mood when I picked him up from school. Usually he doesn't want to leave, yesterday he couldn't wait to get out of there. The whole walk home he was crying. Loudly. Tears mixing with his runny nose. People turning their heads to watch. Needless to say, I felt like the worst mother in the world.

At home, I ask him to use the potty before I start making dinner. He will usually oblige by taking off his pants and underwear and running for the potty (and a little pri'acy). Yesterday, the mention of the potty made him howl even harder. I tried calming him down. I held him and rubbed his back. My hand stopped. That's funny. That feels awful thick to just be underwear. Pushing down his shorts to have a closer look, I discover a diaper. THEY PUT A DIAPER ON HIM AGAIN AFTER I TOLD THEM UNDERWEAR ONLY.

Through his tears Bailey said, "I am sorry, Mommy. Bailey big boy. Bailey like big boy pants. Teacher no like underwear. I am sorry."

Broke my heart right into a thousand little pieces. I wish that the teacher could have witnessed this. I wish she could have seen what she had done to my boy's spirit. If I was angry before I was enraged then.

Hubs called again to set them straight and this time he was so enraged that he threatened to take Bailey out of their school if it happened again. He demanded that the return all of Bailey's diapers (if they don't have them, they can't use them) and demanded an apology.

The teacher apologized this morning and told me she would have the diapers ready for me to take home when I pick Bailey up this afternoon. One more wrong move on the school's part and Bailey is out of there. Enough is enough!!!

(On a happier note, Bailey has not had a toileting accident for about a week now, including nights. Way to go, Bailey!!)

Big Boy Pants

"I need pri'acy," Bailey said slamming the bathroom door in my face.

"Ok, but just let me help you.....," I said trying to pry the door open.

"No, Bailey do it."

I listened, the closed door between us. I heard him slide off his shorts and struggle with his underwear. Then came a grunt as he tried to climb up onto the toilet. A little tinkle tinkle, the rolling of toilet paper, a flush and then the hand towel as it fell to the floor.

He came running out the door and bare bottomed into the living room, arms raised saying, "Big boy pants. Yeah, yeah big boy pants."

Handing him his underwear and shorts to put back on, I said, "Don't forget to put these back on."

Sitting down to put them on, he tooted the fart horn. Smiling, he said, "Big boy butt is noisy. Mommy's big boy butt stinky."

Last I saw of him, he hiding from the tickle monster behind the couch with his big boy pants on his head.

UPDATE

Thanks for all of the great comments and ideas from this post. Hubs called them up yesterday and we have pretty much come to an agreement, that I am not entirely thrilled about, but not entirely unthrilled about either.

They have decided to go along with letting Bailey wear underwear, even during naps as long as I provide a waterproof pad that if he has an accident I am responsible for washing. Fine with me.

Until Bailey feels comfortable enough to tell the teacher when he has to go to the potty, he will wear a pull-up when they go the park. Not so fine with me.

So, now, the ball is in my court and I guess I have to move all things potty to the bathroom and encourage him to tell me when he needs to go instead of having the potty in the living room and Bailey just going when he needs to.

He is still a little shy about using the potty and only wants me to help him. He won't even let Daddy help him. Tonight he is going to stay with Gramma and I hope he feels comfortable enough to tell her and let her help. One step at a time, I suppose.

So Close To Being Angry......

Bailey has been wearing big boy underwear since Saturday.

"No diapers," he said when I tried to put on a clean one, "Bailey not baby."

There have been a few accidents along the way. A reluctance to poop in the potty, a fear of public restrooms but all in all he is doing well. He even refuses to wear a diaper at night, but so far only one night time accident.

When I pushed him before he wasn't ready. Being ready makes a world of difference. (That and forgoing Pull ups. For Bailey they just felt like a diaper and as long as he had his diaper he wasn't going to use the potty.

The first few days, he wandered around the house with only a t-shirt on, the potty in the middle of the living room. This was born more of convenience than anything else. Sometimes I am busy with Sophie and can't do the whole potty dash thing. Whenever he had to go, he just went.

Saturday, I was a little hesitant about going out without a diaper but he didn't have one accident all day!!

He was doing so well. Only one accident on Monday morning while I was in the shower. Then came day care.

I asked the teacher not to use diapers anymore. I told her to take Bailey to the bathroom with the other kids. She agreed even when I asked her not to use them during nap time. I thought it would be ok.

When I went to pick him up, I took it as a good sign that he was still wearing the same clothes.

"We put a diaper on him," the teacher said, "He wouldn't use the potty so we put a diaper on him."

I was puzzled. He was still wearing the same clothes so he didn't have an accident. "What do you mean?"

"We took him to the toilet with the other kids, but he didn't pee. He didn't say anything about needing to pee, so we put a diaper on him."

"Ok," I said, thinking it wasn't a big deal.

Back at home, getting ready for dinner, Bailey comes into the kitchen.

"Bailey need diaper."

"Let's go use the potty."

"No, no, no," he said through tears and while kicking.

"Ok," I said trying to be calm, "Let's just try sitting on the potty."

I read a book to him while he sat there and he relaxed enough to pee.

The battle was repeated at bedtime and I was just about to give in when he relented.

He woke up dry this morning and hasn't had an accident yet.

I think the switching back an forth is confusing him and I am this close to being angry at the teacher. I know there are lots of kids to look after and no one likes cleaning up a mess, but that is her job.

Maybe there was a misunderstanding. Maybe my Japanese wasn't good. Whatever the case, Hubs is gonna call them today and straighten it out.

IT

I have posted about it. I have read about it. I have listened to it. I have watched it. I have bought it. And, now that we are making real headway all I can tell you is when your child is ready, it will all fall into place. More to come later....... (cause I have a jinx problem)

Potty Mouth

I have read lots of books, visited lots of web sites, gotten lots of good advice and although we have just begun our trip into the mysterious world of Potty, I can tell you one thing- a sense of humor goes a long way in dealing with the ups and downs. Keeping that in mind, here are some of the things uttered on POTTY TRAINING DAY ONE.

*Stop playing with it so it can do it's job!
*Don't put the potty on your sister's head.
*Now why would you want to put your foot in it?
*Get that cheese off your butt.
*Toilet paper is for cleaning up not for decorating.
*Look! Mr. Balloon cn use the potty.
*Mommy take picture of Bailey's pee pee.
*It's not time (after bugging him for about the hundredth time asking if he had to go)
*I pee in bathtub! I pee in bathtub!

Wonder what will happen tomorrow?